I am big fan of living in the gray. If you read TYMNTY with any regularity, you know I am not exactly a fan of rule followin’. So, it should come as no surprise to those around me that when I found out I was having a little girl; I had no intention of painting her room pink. But, when I told everyone that I was planning on painting my little girls nursery gray, everyone looked at me like I had said I wasn’t going to allow imagination or laughter. Well guess what all you judgmental little mommies from baby group…you can suck it because it turned out pretty damn cute if you ask me!

Here is how I did it….

- Semi-gloss paint in Dior Gray

-Cream changing table and crib from Pottery Barn

-Butterflies on the wall- I got these from the craft store and super glued them on the wall in a cool pattern.

-Tree- This one is from an artist, but I have made these trees before and you can too! Just see my other post “Tree Hugger”.

- Rocking chair -I had it made because I didn’t want some cheesy crap from the kids stores. I found a chair I liked that matched with the décor of the room, and asked them to add a rocking mechanism to it. Simple solution and cheap too!

-Picture Wall- Choose any pictures and quotes you want done in different frames. I did quotes from Alice in Wonderland and Coco Channel, a vintage British poster, and black and white photos. I also included one pink princess painting for good measure.

- Day Bed- I had it made and covered in cream fabric (which is fantastic because it doubles as a couch when guests come to see the little monkey). The pillows are from West Elm and Jonathan Adler.

If you have any questions just write me!

I would like to make an announcement…I have the smartest child on the planet. There is no hard evidence with which to back up this claim, more of gut feeling, but at any moment I am pretty sure Harvard is going to call and offer her spot in the 2011 class.  She is also quite gifted in the kitchen. This morning I made haystacks and when I stopped pouring the butterscotch chips into the bowl she let out a large burp which I interpreted as a “put more butterscotch in there, Lady” so I did…and it was a better finished project because of it.  I am just saying….

Here is the a recipe for Haystackies written in part by my daughter.

G-E-N-I-U-S. —————->

What you’ll Need:

1 bag butterscotch chips 

1 bag of milk chocolate chips

4 cups of chow mien noodles

1/2 cup of peanut butter

1 teaspoon teaspoon of cinnamon 

1 teaspoon of vanilla

Directions:

1. Place the peanut butter and butter scotch in the microwave for one minute (the butterscotch will only be partially melted)

2. Mix in vanilla and cinnamon

3. Stir in chow mien noodles and chocolate chips

4. Dump spoon size chunks onto a wax paper lined cookie sheet and place in the freezer for 45 minutes

5. Make sure no one whose opinion about you matters is in the general vicinity

6. Lick the bowl 

7. Lick the spoon

8. Remove the haystackies from the freezer and allow to adjust to room temperature 

9. EAT!

10.  ENJOY!

Having a new baby at home is hands down the most fun I have ever had, but it leaves little time for anything else.  I am not going to lie to you, my personal hygiene is beginning to come into question due to my lack of time to shower. Whatever…hand sanitizer, deodorant, and a breath mint IS like a shower when you have a newborn.  That being said, ONE dish meals are my crack right now*.  They take less time to prepare, have less clean up, and allow me to shove food down my throat in between ‘nap times’ that actually resembles a real meal.  Here is one of favorites…Shepards Pie.

*PLEASE do not write me telling me how crack is bad for the baby or how crack references are insensitive or how your friend who is a recovering crackhead is offended by my joke. I haven’t slept and I have no patience for people who do not find crack jokes funny even if they are an easy way out.  

If you want to lose all sense of personal dignity you can throw some gravy on this puppy. I warn you you will not feel real great about yourself…but you will probably go into a food coma so you won’t even be awake to acknowledge your low self esteem.

To my dear friends and readers of Things Your Mother Never Taught You:

Thank you for your patience over the last couple of days, as many of you know we had a beautiful, healthy and perfect little baby girl last week.   We’re just getting to know each other and settle into our lives together, but expect posting to resume over the next few days.

Thanks again for all the love and support.  My cup truly runneth over.

Love,

Brooke Peterson

Those of you who are not within in a ten mile radius of me may not know that I am just a few short days away from having a little girl! Those of you who are within a ten-mile radius have heard me bitch at some point in the last nine months…I am loud and not prone to ‘keepin my complaints to myself’.  Since this site is named ‘Things Your Mother Never Taught You’ I have been thinking a lot about what I want to teach my little lady and I think ‘GIRLS RULE’ pretty much sums it up! Here are some of the things I know… a public letter to my unborn daughter:

1. You can bake a cake AND run a boardroom my darling little girl. You can wear a tank top from old navy whilst wearing pants from Gucci. You can read Bronte one night and watch American Idol the next. Don’t let people tell you life is either/or…it can be BOTH!

2. Be a girl’s girl. PERIOD. 

3. There are more brilliant women on this planet than you will ever find time to read, listen to, watch, learn from, or emulate…but that sure as hell doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try to seek them out.

4. Listen to wise women, here are a few to start with:

CHARLOTTE WHITTON: Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.

MARGARET THATCHER: If you want anything said, ask a man. If you want something done, ask a woman.

GLORIA STEINEM: Any woman who chooses to behave like a full human being should be warned that the armies of the status quo will treat her as something of a dirty joke. That’s their natural and first weapon. She will need her sisterhood.

JACQUELINE KENNEDY ONASSIS:  I am a woman above everything else.

So in the honor of my future President/Teacher/Artist/Rocket Scientist/ or whatever she chooses to be daughter…I give you a the first cake recipe my mama ever taught me and some words of wisdom from brilliant ladies because in life I believe you can have your cake…and eat it too.  Roma’s Pineapple Upside Down Cake…The Jr. Version!

Ingredients:

1. Box of vanilla cake mix

2. 3 eggs

3. ¼ cup vegetable oil

4. ½ cup of citrus soda (sprite or 7-up works like a dream)

5. 1 can pineapple slices with juice set aside

6. 1 bottle of maraschino cherries

Directions:

1. Preheat the oven to 400 degrees 

2. Line the bottom of a non-stick cake pan with pineapple slices and place a cherry in the middle of each slice. This is a great cake to use a casserole dish for so that you have maximum surface area for pineapple slice. If you use a casserole dish ya gotta non-stick spray the hell out of it so your cake slips out like butta when you flip it over. 

3. Mix cake mix, pineapple juice from the can, soda, vegetable oil, and eggs together and whisk for a few minutes until there are no lumps. 

4. Pour over pineapple slices and toss into the oven for about 30 minutes depending on the depth of your pan. The guide on the back of the cake box is pretty accurate. 

5. Let cake coolio and flip that puppy over onto the serving dish of your choosing.

Extra Credit- mix a little rum with some whip cream to garnish the cake for serving.

Finally, I don’t have a lot of rules for you my dear daughter but this (see pic) will NOT be happening at our casa…just so you have fair warning. There is a time and place for dressing like a hussy and trying new things and it’s called college.

Love,

Mom

** My actual favorite things are naughty time with Daddy and liquor but that didn’t sound as good as the title ‘Cakes and Babies’.