Here is how I did it….

- Semi-gloss paint in Dior Gray

-Cream changing table and crib from Pottery Barn

-Butterflies on the wall- I got these from the craft store and super glued them on the wall in a cool pattern.

-Tree- This one is from an artist, but I have made these trees before and you can too! Just see my other post “Tree Hugger”.

- Rocking chair -I had it made because I didn’t want some cheesy crap from the kids stores. I found a chair I liked that matched with the décor of the room, and asked them to add a rocking mechanism to it. Simple solution and cheap too!

-Picture Wall- Choose any pictures and quotes you want done in different frames. I did quotes from Alice in Wonderland and Coco Channel, a vintage British poster, and black and white photos. I also included one pink princess painting for good measure.

- Day Bed- I had it made and covered in cream fabric (which is fantastic because it doubles as a couch when guests come to see the little monkey). The pillows are from West Elm and Jonathan Adler.

If you have any questions just write me!

Mama loves her some Yoga! I found a teacher who really gets me, and by gets me I mean she lets me listen to Jay-Z while doing Warrior pose.

I noticed a funky smell the other day while lying in Child’s pose…and it was my mat!

All yogis have to admit that they almost never wash their yoga mats (we know who we are).

Here’s a little homemade antibacterial spray to keep your mat smelling minty and delish!

What you’ll need:

Spray bottle

¼ cup White Vinegar

3 tablespoons of Rubbing Alcohol

1 teaspoon Tea Tree oil

Bergamont Mint Oil

Directions:

Fill the spray bottle with the water and vinegar. Add Tea Tree oil and 13 drops of the Bergamont Mint essential oil. Fill the rest of the bottle with water. Spray the yoga mat evenly and allow it to air dry.

Namaste Bitches!

Every time I walk into the Saks 5^th Avenue beauty department I feel as if there must be some undiscovered elixir, cream, or cleanser that will most definitely make me more desirable. Just when one of the snooty little ladies behind the counter convinces me that she knows what “it” is, and that it is worth a second mortgage on my home to buy said cream, I snap back to reality and whip out my iPod, blast me some Christina Aguilera ‘Beautiful’ while I mosey on home shaking my ass extra hard near construction zones in hopes of a cat call to really seal the deal.

But alas one still needs a bit o’face wash and I have found this little recipe makes a great one!

Packed with anti-oxidants, the elderberry is a small but mighty berry often used as an anti-inflammatory.

What you’ll need:

6oz. Unscented base cleanser

½ Organic Cucumber

8 drops of Elderberry Extract

5 drops of Grapefruit Essential Oil

Directions:

Chop the cucumber and puree it in a blender. Strain to get rid of the seeds. In a container of your choice add the base cleanser, cucumber liquid, elderberry extract, and grapefruit oil. Mix to incorporate and cleanse away!

This cleanser is perishable, so make sure you store it in the fridge!

I am with a man whose family does not drink. Yes the universe has a sense of humor*.

I can’t really say ‘Hey guys! Do you want some water…with your water?’

These jazzy little ice cubes dress up anything including water for my in-laws.

Directions:

Fill an ice cube tray with water half way and add any of the following to brighten up any drink!

- Crystallized Ginger

- Rose Petals

-Lemon/Orange peel

-Mint

- Fresh berries

*Gotta be honest with you ‘Universe’…not that funny to me.

If I am going to have to lie to my trainer* about eating bread, you better bet your ass that I am eating it with butter. I assume bread and butter to be a dietary luxury for dinner party guests as well, so I figured I better make it extra snazzy.

If you’re looking for a jazzed up way of serving butter this is the perfect little trick:

Wrap softened butter in rose petals (any color) and place in the refrigerator for a few minutes until chilled.

The rose petals act as little vessels while infusing the butter with the fragrant scent of the rose.

Remove the petals from the fridge and serve!

* Steve if you are reading this I just want to say…THAT I AM NOT SORRY! I don’t want to live in your carb free world of perfect abs. As as long as we are being honest with each other, every time you leave me at the end of a work out to do cardio on the honor system…I don’t honor it! I like bread and hate running…sue me.

All White, All the Time (coincidentally also Arizona’s new state motto)!  

The guest room of most folks houses tends to be the ‘all the old shit that isn’t good enough for the rest of us to use on a daily basis’ catch all room. If you are fortunate enough to have a guest room and to have people who actually want to be a guest in your house or if your partner is a snorer and you end up spending almost every night sleeping in the guest room because he refuses to address this problem with his doctor and instead insists that you are making it up (oh yeah because you know what I like to do is make up stuff that forces me to drag my ass from our nice comfy bed at 2 in the morning into the super cold guest room with the bad mattress).**

Wait, where was I,  oh yes, I would like to give you a quick tip to making this room FABULOUS!  Make your guest room ALL WHITE.  It seems like a pretty simple concept but trust me it works wonders! Here is the simplest way to do it:

-Dedicate a Saturday morning to get this all done.  Saturday mornings are the best time to hit up a few garage sales to get some of the big pieces you’ll need, head board, side tables, benches, etc. 

-White out your all your pieces.  Use a couple different methods of painting depending on what floats your boat. I like to hand paint a few pieces and spray paint a few. If you have a question about what will work best on each piece ASK the guy/gal at the paint counter when you go to pick up your supplies. It is like asking me what you can do with a box of cake mix…it turns me on.

-Now its time to do your soft goods: sheets, curtains, rugs, ect. Here are my suggestions if you want to blow your own mind on what a budget keepin’ bee-otch you can be.

a. Sheets-Ross Dress for Less and TJ Maxx

b. Rugs and Lighting -IKEA 

c. Curtains- Target and IKEA

-Put all together! The room pictured here gives you an idea of gorgeous this look can be when done well. Granted this image is from Elle Décor but it illustrates the way white makes everything feels cohesive. 

** Get a Breath Right strip DAMMIT! You know who you are!

I’ve always found that dressing any bottle up in a bucket of ice and a flower really sets the mood without breaking the bank.  Tonight when you are cozying up to your loved one (to watch Private Chefs of Beverly Hills on Food Network, wink wink) pull out a bottle of bubbly and put that baby on ice.  

I think Bette Davis put it best when she said “There comes a time in every woman’s life when the only thing that helps is a glass of champagne.”

The cheapest and quickest way to get your home in the mood for Spring…Essential Oils from Plantlife. Starting at less than 4 dollars a bottle, these oils can be used as room sprays, put on light bulbs, put on a wet rag for dusting, or mixed with bath products to give them a fresh spring scent. I LOVE the lemon, grapefruit, and sweet orange and you will find a zillion smell good and feel good reasons to make this part of your spring must haves!

For those of you who are little short on holiday decorations, you can let those annoying ‘oh my god look at how cute we are in our matching sweaters’ card people make themselves useful.

1. Grab some string, ribbon, or twine and tie it between two objects at least a 1 ½  feet apart. I like festive vases. Or tie it from end to end of your fireplace mantle.

2. Pick your bad-ass holiday decorating self up some clothes pins (laundry aisle of the grocery store) and put some ‘jazz hands’ on ‘em. Which basically means, glue whatever you’ve got on hand to the top of the clothes pin. I like the little blue snowflakes pictured here because a retarded monkey could cut them out of any paper you have on hand. But, of course, feel free to go wild. This project is an acceptable time to bust out the glitter. On a side note if you are a stripper anytime is an appropriate time to bust out the glitter… Every job has it perks, ladies!

3. Clip cards to your clothesline. Only put up the attractive people though. What? Too far? Nope. Just right.

Hope ya’all catch the show today and thanks in advance for all the nice flowers, notes, cards, chocolates, subscriptions to the Wine of the Month Club, and envelopes stuffed with cash that you sent as congratulatory gifts.