Welcome one and all to the launch of…
Things Your Mother Never Taught You
1. In life, cooking is optional, eating is not. If you lose your take-out menus, grab a recipe from Eat Me to ease your hunger pains.- 2. Saturdays are for parties or hangovers… I am a fan of both. Check out the weekly post under Saturdays for ways to do it all.
- 3. Kim Kardashian’s ass is available without a gym membership… just clickety-click on Do Me.
- 4. What you wear—and how you live—should be a matter of taste, not budget, ’cause money does not buy taste… does it, Ms. Hilton? Try Wear Me or Live in Me to put this nugget of wisdom to the test.
- 5. Food should be Cheap N’ Easy like Carrie Prejan (I do, however, believe in a food’s right to marry a food of the same sex, just for the record.) I show you how to make meals for 5 bucks, in 5 minutes with 5 ingredients on our web show Cheap N’ Easy.
- 6. Cocktails should be made in bulk. There is no joke here—some things are too serious to mess with. On your way to Costco to pick up tequila, check out Drink Me for my must-know mixology.
- 7. If you don’t have something nice to say, it is probably damn funny. If I don’t have something nice to say it will be damn funny and WILL appear in my weekly column called Yeah, I said It.
- 8. There are some very wise women out there, including mothers other than yours. Let some of the smartest, coolest women I know—and some I’d like to know, like Maria Shriver and Michelle Obama—offer up some sage advice under Wise Women.
- 9. It’s totally acceptable not to read ‘real stuff’ like newspapers and books. But if you decide you want to absorb a little sumthin sumthin in the way of literature (by my definition, anyway) check out Read Me.
- 10. There are tricks that can make any woman look like a chef, decorator, party planner, fashionista, and overall pulled-together grown-up… and I can teach a little something about the first four! Use Tips & Tricks as your cheatsheet to fake you through it, my dear.
So come on in, take off your shoes, browse around, and root through my drawers like you do when your man’s in the shower. You will read about everything on our top ten list, plus I’ll teach you how to get an entire room full of people drunk for less than the cost of dinner and a movie. What more do you people want from me?!? Free martinis for every registered subscriber? Yeah, I thought of that too, but apparently that’s not what they call ‘advertiser friendly.’
I hope you all find something to take away and something to bring you back.
Love ya’all like a fat kid loves cake… Cheers!
Brooke Peterson
