For those of you who have not picked up a newspaper, turned on a TV, or tried to get a line of credit for anything over a dollar…. the recession is ON like Donkey Kong.

I know a lot of ya’all have given up your gym memberships in an effort to save your shekels.  Well I say good!

Screw doing exercise for the sake of fitting into single digit garments! I am not a goddamn gerbil and I will not run on a treadmill like a caged rodent. What’s next?  A maze with a slim fast shake at the end?  NO MORE!  Exercise should be fun, free, and make me feel like Gabriel Reese even if I look like an Orca with a learning disability.

I am only one lady* (I use the term lady loosely and by loosely I mean like the way we use sobriety in conjunction with Lindsey Lohan) and I am on the constant prowl for women who can help me with content for Things Your Mother Never Taught You. They say ‘Do your job BrookieP!’ and I would say ‘Why? You are so much better at it!’ So recently when my skinny jeans became my fat jeans I posed this question to some of my fitness forward friends…

What are some fun and inexpensive ways to stay fit? Here are the three best answers I got while trying to avoid doing my own work:

From Betsy: I often get lazy to go to the gym and get a sudden burst of energy around 9pm and don’t really know how to release it, so I started turning on music (I use the Hit List Music Channel on TV… and sometimes switch it up, maybe Show Tunes if I’m in a funny mood). I put on a pair of heels, yes with my pajamas, pick up 5 lb weights, and have a dance party by myself. It’s sooooo fun; you can dance however the hell you want and no one’s judging you. If you get low, you feel the burn in your thighs.

From Laura: Fitclick.com has like a zillion workout programs you can download for free and it lets you track everything on line. It’s like your own personal trainer minus the 100 bucks an hour part.

From …me… because I feel like a cheater if I don’t contribute something:
Grab a milk crate and turn on The Kardashians. Yeah, I am probably going to need to explain this one a little further. Folks you need 30 minutes of aerobic activity 4 times a week. I figure if I am going to let my brain deteriorate with reality programming I might as well not let my figure deteriorate too. Here’s the set up… Pick anything sturdy that is 12 to 16 inches off the ground and place it in front of the big black box that is slowly consuming your life and step it up*.  I find the simpler you keep the moves the better. Step up with one foot and then the other and go down the exact same way.  Fancy dance moves don’t really burn a lot more calories and after 30 minutes you will feel the burn in places you didn’t think should be open to the burn. At the point where I feel like quitting and laying on the couch with Ben and Jerry I like to let Kim’s booty act like my own personal incentive plan.

And if all else fails just order yourself the attached scale and call it a day!

* Not to be confused with ‘Step up’ a dance movie that makes you believe a little hip hop is all you need to fight off the powers that be in the ghetto… Thanks but I am gonna go with joining a gang and packin’ heat.

My friend Emily sent me this and I got to tell you that after years of cooking these are some fantastic tricks and tips… Now get cooking!

It took top chefs years to figure out these helpful tips. You can put them to work immediately!

By Natalie Ermann Russell on USA Weekend magazine

It’s extremely reassuring to know what the experts do to overcome common kitchen challenges. If they can make life in the most important room in the house easy, painless and delicious, we want to know how. So we’ve asked noteworthy chefs, editors and authors to share some of their most ingenious kitchen solutions.

Food stuck to your favorite pot? Sandy Gluck, host of “Everyday Food” on Martha Stewart Radio on Sirius XM, recommends simmering a baking soda and water mixture in the pot to help lift the food off. If you cooked something made with eggs, flour and milk (like pancakes), soak the pot in cold water first. “If you use hot water, it sets the starch and makes it glue on,” says Sara Moulton, executive chef at “Gourmet” and host of “Sara’s Weeknight Meals” on PBS.

Cut-up fruits and veggies turn brown? Lucinda Scala Quinn, executive editorial director for food at “Martha Stewart Living,” suggests placing things such as trimmed artichokes into acidulated water. To do that, use enough water to cover the vegetables along with the juice of one lemon or lime. Rubbing cut surfaces with lemon juice also prevents browning. “And when storing, cover the surface directly with a piece of plastic,” says Allie Lewis Clapp, food director at “Real Simple.” “This prevents air from getting to the flesh, which is what causes it to turn brown.”

Stale bread? Sprinkle a slice or two with water and microwave it for 30 seconds, Scala Quinn says. That restores some of the bread’s softness.

Chopped vegetables make a mess going from cutting board to pot? Use a metal bench scraper. “It’s supposed to be used to scrape up dough from a work surface, and it’s very good for that,” Moulton says. “But you can also scoop chopped vegetables to the side of the bench scraper and take them to the pan without dropping any.”

The recipe calls for buttermilk, but you don’t have any? Make a substitute, Gluck says. For each cup of buttermilk, place 2 tablespoons of lemon juice in a glass measure, then add enough low-fat milk to equal 1 cup.

Dull knives? “Wash and dry them immediately after use, avoid leaving them in the sink, and never put them in the dishwasher,” Lewis Clapp says. “Sitting water will quickly dull the blades.”

Cutting board slips? “Always put a damp towel underneath it,” says Ken Oringer, the chef and co-owner of Clio, Uni, Toro, KO Prime and La Verdad in Boston. “It needs to be well-grounded.”

Garlicky hands? “Stainless steel will neutralize the odor,” Lewis Clapp says. “Don’t fall for the gimmicky stainless steel ’soap bars’ that many kitchen stores will sell you — your sink and faucet are probably made of stainless, so just rub your hands on them.” A cut lemon also works.

Runaway peelers? A Y-shaped peeler gives you more control over fruits and vegetables that are harder to peel, like apples and butternut squash. “And it makes peeling significantly faster,” Lewis Clapp says. Also, place the veggies on your work surface rather than try to peel in midair.

Spices lost their zing? “Heat or toast them to reinvigorate the flavor,” Scala Quinn says. Put them in a cast-iron skillet over low heat with no oil. If you’re using a thinner pan, be careful, because the spices can burn quickly. (In the future, Gluck suggests, store them out of direct sunlight in opaque jars. Write the date of purchase on the bottom.)

Onions make you cry? Try goggles. “Years ago, someone sent me a pair of the kind you use for welding,” Moulton says, “and now they sell actual onion goggles in kitchen stores.” Also, make sure your onion is fresh and your knife is sharp.

Cleaning shellfish? A barbecue cleaning brush is excellent for scrubbing clams and mussels, Oringer says. The bristles are nice and sturdy.

Chicken and other meats slip out of your hands as you try to prepare them? Chilled meat is easier to handle. “The cooler the better,” Moulton says. “As it gets warmer, it gets more slippery.”

Sauce won’t stick to the pasta? Don’t add oil to the pasta water to prevent clumping; instead, stir often. Oil keeps the sauce from adhering, Moulton says.

Dry turkey? To retain the juices, let meats of all kinds rest before you cut into them, Moulton says. The length of resting time depends on the weight of the meat. A pork chop, for instance, would probably need about five minutes; a turkey, a half-hour.

Meat slices stick to your knife? Use a hollow-edge knife. “The wavy hollow-edge blade prevents food from sticking, allowing the knife to pass through foods more easily,” Lewis Clapp says. “It also lets you slice meat more thinly.”

Your food doesn’t brown nicely? Before cooking, pat meats and vegetables dry with paper towels. If you don’t, they will steam and won’t get that nice brown crust, Moulton says.

Raw meat juices spill onto your work space, contaminating it? “I love parchment for protecting the counter when working with raw meat and fish,” Scala Quinn says. Spread out a sheet under your cutting board or bowls, then throw it away when you’re done.

Unwieldy collection of pot lids? To keep them with their “mates,” slip lids over the handles of your pots and hang them overhead from a pot rack, Scala Quinn says.

Brown sugar hardened? “Place an apple wedge or two in the bag with the sugar, seal it and store at room temperature,” Gluck says. “It should soften in a day or two. A slice of bread, instead of the apple, works well, too.” Lewis Clapp also puts her bag of brown sugar inside a second, resealable plastic bag.

Scrape your fingers using a box grater? “I love the Microplane grater,” says Moulton, who uses it for ginger, garlic, citrus, Parmesan and chocolate (you need a separate one for sweet stuff so it won’t taste like garlic). It’s a straight rasp with a handle, so you just hold it over the bowl with one hand and grate with the other.

Leftover broth or stock? Freeze the broth in an ice cube tray. “Once frozen, transfer the cubes to a resealable container, and label and date it,” Gluck says. Each cube is equal to about 2 tablespoons.

Herbs scatter when you chop them? “I use rubber bands to bunch herbs before chopping, especially chives and parsley,” Oringer says.

Lemons too firm to juice? Gluck microwaves them on high in 10-second increments until they are softened. Now the fruit can be juiced easily.

Not sure when pancakes are ready to be flipped? Use a slotted fish spatula, designed to lift delicate foods, to check underneath a pancake as it cooks. “It’s not just for fish,” Moulton says.

One the greatest confidence builders of any woman who wants feel like a female savant is to know every possible way to cheat and trick your way to the finish line. Back when our mothers were growing up, the only secret lady tips they got came from our grandmothers. But girls, we got this newfangled dealio I like to call the INTER WEB and it is a cheaters’ paradise!

All my girlfriends know that I collect tips for informational purposes. Yeah, like your college age brother collects shot glasses for ‘decoration purposes.’ Screw that he is getting hammered with those puppies and I am using any tidbit I can to pummel my way to an easier life.

Greet your guests with a classic… The Hot Toddy. They’re a cinch to make and will fill your home with warm hearts and happy faces. All you need is whiskey, lemons, cinnamon sticks, honey and hot water. CHEERS!

When you want the girls to come over so you can tell them all about the Date Night Salmon, here is the perfect salad to serve. It’s sweet and sour and fresh and so good for you… exactly what you had hoped the date would be.

Click here for the list of ingredients, preparation instructions and nutrition information.

Everyone needs at least one romantic dinner recipe up their sleeve. One that takes very little energy, so you can save all you have for later. In this episode Brooke whips up a salmon dish that will inspire you to cancel the dinner reservations and dine at your place tonight.

Click here for the list of ingredients, preparation instructions and nutrition information.

This dessert is a Cheap n Easy™ take on Tiramisu. Cookies, chocolate, and cream make an irresistible combination and it really couldn’t be any simpler.

Why give store-bought chocolates when it’s just as easy to make them from scratch? In this episode of Cheap n’ Easy™, you’ll learn to make truffles that you can flavor any way you like! It’s the perfect way to seal the deal on a night of romance.

Since you are probably getting all decked out for your date, we here at Cheap n’ Easy™ decided to deck out a can of Tomato soup. This recipe is perfect for a romantic dinner because of its beautiful pink color, and it couldn’t be any easier or taste any better!

My mama was a couture handbag designer and although I greatly admired her work I have just never been one for hand-stitching a clutch… Sorry mama! I found this great little project online and it’s a simple one to put some pop into your wardrobe.

Fold-Over Clutch Purse

Supplies Needed:

• 1/2 yard faux suede, leather, or fabric
• 1/2 yard coordinating cotton print for lining
• 1/2 yard cotton quilt batting
• KK-2000 spray adhesive
• Sulky transfer markers
• 5 brass rings (from the hardware store)
• Pins
• Monofilament thread
• Conventional sewing thread

Cutting:

Mark and cut a panel from each of the following: suede, cotton print and the quilt batting, measuring 15” x 29”.

Sewing:

1. Spray the backside of the suede and the quilt batting with the spray adhesive. Gently lay the suede on top of the quilt batting and smooth out any wrinkles. Pin the edges.

2. Stitch the two layers together across the width of the panel, at the center.

3. Layer the quilted suede panel with the cotton lining, right sides together, pin the edges.

4. Stitch each end together along the 15” width, through all layers. Turn right side out and press the newly sewn edges.

5. Fold the panel in half with right side of suede facing itself and the cotton lining facing out. Pin the sides together and stitch each side seam.

6. To make square corners on the bottom of the bag, fold each bottom corner against itself and sew one inch in from the point of the triangle.

Turn the bag suede side out, fold the bag in half and steam press, using a pressing cloth.

And… voila! Clutch nouveau.